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Friday, 25 November 2011

Learning To Be Alone Isn't Hard

By Lou Prince


A lot of people make choices in their lives that are based on what is expected of them. These expectations, however, are not always in your best interests. When it comes to becoming an adult, many people feel tremendous pressure to be a part of a couple and, as such, transform into serial daters. You will often hear the phrase, 'I'm just better in a relationship', but this is nothing but an excuse that masks the fact that these individuals do not know how to be by themselves. Learning to be alone can be invigorating and the opposite of the stereotype that casts singles as perpetually lonely.

While partnerships have their upsides, you really cannot contribute to the best of your abilities until you understand what you bring to your own table. A sense of independence should be cultivated, especially in women, but the traditional of school of thought pushes people to date and, oftentimes, they settle.

Assessing these attributes is simple when you allow yourself to be single. Many people don't realize the joy and freedom that can come from living life on their own terms. Also, being single doesn't mean that you don't get to have fun in a sexual sense, just that these trysts do not have to define you.

Another important aspect of learning to be alone is discovering that your life is already full of meaningful relationships that deserve your time and attention. Friends who you may have ditched when dating will most likely be ecstatic to have you back in their lives and you can revel in the simple joy of quality time out on the town without shackling yourself to the idea of finding a mate.

This is another important lesson - friendships are as important as the romantic entanglements in your life. It is imperative to keep up with the changes that are happening in your friend's lives so that you don't grow apart as the years go by. Making time for a friends night out, without the requirement of looking for a mate, can expose you to having a good time without this expectation of coupling.

It may sound trite, but embracing a hobby can also be a great tool in gauging what your desires truly are. When you devote yourself to something like a dance or art class, you'll be doing something for you and this type of selfishness is something that more people should engage in. The world is more interesting when it is filled with interested people who are committed to exploring the world around them. learning to be alone




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