Unfortunately, some relationships do not last forever. Whether the breakup is over a long-disputed argument or the chemistry has fizzled out, time apart may be the best thing for you both. Although he may not make it easy on you, there are ways to win him back.
Take your time. Reintroducing your ex into your life should be gradual. Initially, all activities should be light, airy and fun. Discussing why you broke up and/or getting back together at this stage is ill-advised unless your intention is to run him off in the opposite direction. Going slow protects you, too, because it keeps all those old feelings for him in check.
Are you close with his family at all? Are you good friends with his mother? Then nurture those relationships on their own. Don't come across to his family and friends as a desperate ex-girlfriend trying to weasel her way back into her boyfriend's life. Honor the ties you already have with his family and close friends as stand-alone relationships, that don't necessarily involve him. For example, invite his sister to a concert (if you're friends with her) and don't even mention him during the event. Dress wild and have a fabulous time with his sister. If you break down and start whining/crying about him to his family, however, this tactic will completely backfire.
Act as if everything is great. If you did the dumping, you will probably feel guilty so don't overdo the "life is great" pose. But even more, don't assume he is just sitting around waiting for your call. Often someone will get dumped and then turn around and find a more suitable partner. So don't get cocky. When you call, talk about neutral topics such as the weather, the election (well, skip that one), gardening, that sort of thing. Be upbeat without being nauseatingly so.
If he is in a new relationship, be respectful of that. But if you want the friend part of your ex back, let him know you know he's in a new relationship and that you're fine with it. Think about sending him two movie passes and make it clear they're for him and his new girlfriend to use. Tell him you just want the friendship back.
Communicate with your ex. If there is a mutual desire to get back together, sit down and discuss how things can be better this time around. Make sure there is a commitment from both sides of the relationship.
Think of small things you can do to show her you care. Pick up a copy of her favorite band's new CD on its release date, or help her carry in her groceries. Aim for thoughtful little acts of kindness. Don't buy her extravagant gifts as this will likely make her feel uncomfortable.
After you have had some time to cool down, get out there and go on a few dates. Visit bars and clubs to flirt with other girls. This will get your mind away from any negative emotions and restore your self-confidence. In addition, your ex is likely to hear word of this from mutual friends and develop a feeling of jealousy. Realizing that she may actually lose you may be the spark to rebuild the lines of communication with you. However, avoid doing this immediately after a breakup as she may view this as a sign that you did not value your relationship with her.
You may be desperate to have him back in your life, but don't show it. Once he decides he wants you back, he may want you to do all the emotional work of apologizing, explaining and begging to get back together. Don't do any of this. Never say you miss him or that you can't live without him. Instead, be honest without sounding desperate; for example, "I want to make things right," or "I want our relationship to work." Let him do most of the talking, if possible. He has already decided he wants you back, so don't try to take over. Just react, thoughtfully.
This is a problem many people seem to have when trying to win ex back. Even if it was your fault that your relationship ended, it doesn't mean that you have to say how sorry you are every time you meet. Give one good, heart-filled apology a few weeks after the break up is over and then move on.
Once you have done the work suggested above,making contact with your ex is the next move. This needs to be handled with care and caution as rushing this process could undo the good work you have done so far.
Once you know the reason for the breakup you need to stop being needy. That means no talking or texting your ex. This is going to be extremely difficult, but if you stay strong your determination will be rewarded. One of the reasons this works is simply because it demonstrates self-confidence which is one thing that attracted your ex to you in the 1st place.
A very close attention must be paid to this last point and a very important tip on how to make someone jealous. If you are looking to get your ex back then you must ban any type of contact your ex. This will make your ex miss you, a very fine technique to make someone jealous, she would think that you may be found someone else and you are busy with them. In case, your ex contacts you, never answer the phone fast, miss their call and then call after few hours, apologize that you couldn't attend and tell them that you were busy with some or something special. This will definitely make them jealous.
We make plans for college, for things that we want to build and fix, and yet... we almost never make relationship plans. Do you really expect that you are going to just somehow magically find out what the right things are to win her back? You need to have a plan if you want to come as close to a guarantee that you DO end up back with her in the end.
Take your time. Reintroducing your ex into your life should be gradual. Initially, all activities should be light, airy and fun. Discussing why you broke up and/or getting back together at this stage is ill-advised unless your intention is to run him off in the opposite direction. Going slow protects you, too, because it keeps all those old feelings for him in check.
Are you close with his family at all? Are you good friends with his mother? Then nurture those relationships on their own. Don't come across to his family and friends as a desperate ex-girlfriend trying to weasel her way back into her boyfriend's life. Honor the ties you already have with his family and close friends as stand-alone relationships, that don't necessarily involve him. For example, invite his sister to a concert (if you're friends with her) and don't even mention him during the event. Dress wild and have a fabulous time with his sister. If you break down and start whining/crying about him to his family, however, this tactic will completely backfire.
Act as if everything is great. If you did the dumping, you will probably feel guilty so don't overdo the "life is great" pose. But even more, don't assume he is just sitting around waiting for your call. Often someone will get dumped and then turn around and find a more suitable partner. So don't get cocky. When you call, talk about neutral topics such as the weather, the election (well, skip that one), gardening, that sort of thing. Be upbeat without being nauseatingly so.
If he is in a new relationship, be respectful of that. But if you want the friend part of your ex back, let him know you know he's in a new relationship and that you're fine with it. Think about sending him two movie passes and make it clear they're for him and his new girlfriend to use. Tell him you just want the friendship back.
Communicate with your ex. If there is a mutual desire to get back together, sit down and discuss how things can be better this time around. Make sure there is a commitment from both sides of the relationship.
Think of small things you can do to show her you care. Pick up a copy of her favorite band's new CD on its release date, or help her carry in her groceries. Aim for thoughtful little acts of kindness. Don't buy her extravagant gifts as this will likely make her feel uncomfortable.
After you have had some time to cool down, get out there and go on a few dates. Visit bars and clubs to flirt with other girls. This will get your mind away from any negative emotions and restore your self-confidence. In addition, your ex is likely to hear word of this from mutual friends and develop a feeling of jealousy. Realizing that she may actually lose you may be the spark to rebuild the lines of communication with you. However, avoid doing this immediately after a breakup as she may view this as a sign that you did not value your relationship with her.
You may be desperate to have him back in your life, but don't show it. Once he decides he wants you back, he may want you to do all the emotional work of apologizing, explaining and begging to get back together. Don't do any of this. Never say you miss him or that you can't live without him. Instead, be honest without sounding desperate; for example, "I want to make things right," or "I want our relationship to work." Let him do most of the talking, if possible. He has already decided he wants you back, so don't try to take over. Just react, thoughtfully.
This is a problem many people seem to have when trying to win ex back. Even if it was your fault that your relationship ended, it doesn't mean that you have to say how sorry you are every time you meet. Give one good, heart-filled apology a few weeks after the break up is over and then move on.
Once you have done the work suggested above,making contact with your ex is the next move. This needs to be handled with care and caution as rushing this process could undo the good work you have done so far.
Once you know the reason for the breakup you need to stop being needy. That means no talking or texting your ex. This is going to be extremely difficult, but if you stay strong your determination will be rewarded. One of the reasons this works is simply because it demonstrates self-confidence which is one thing that attracted your ex to you in the 1st place.
A very close attention must be paid to this last point and a very important tip on how to make someone jealous. If you are looking to get your ex back then you must ban any type of contact your ex. This will make your ex miss you, a very fine technique to make someone jealous, she would think that you may be found someone else and you are busy with them. In case, your ex contacts you, never answer the phone fast, miss their call and then call after few hours, apologize that you couldn't attend and tell them that you were busy with some or something special. This will definitely make them jealous.
We make plans for college, for things that we want to build and fix, and yet... we almost never make relationship plans. Do you really expect that you are going to just somehow magically find out what the right things are to win her back? You need to have a plan if you want to come as close to a guarantee that you DO end up back with her in the end.
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