An ex-boyfriend is an "ex" for a reason. You or he decided not to continue the relationship, or maybe you decided together. But now he's gone, and you miss him in your life. He may be hurt and not want any further communication, or he may have moved on and not want any further contact. The difference between you wanting to maintain a friendship and being a stalker is how you go about trying to reconnect.
Email him or send him an instant message asking how his day was. Not only will this show that you still care, but it will show that you have moved past your differences and can finally be there for him as a friend and someone to talk to. Do not begin interrogating him on the internet. This will only make him less likely to consider you again as his girlfriend.
Determine exactly why your relationship ended in the first place. Figure out what mistakes you made and what positive aspects there were to your relationship. If you get to the point where you contact your ex or have a conversation with him, you'll need to have a clear idea on exactly what happened between the two of you. This is particularly important so that you can both prevent the same problems from occurring in the future.
Behave as if you are old friends, not former lovers (who later became enemies). When he meets you at the cafe you always loved, it will be tempting to run and kiss him full on on the mouth. Control yourself. This person is probably very wounded (or perhaps you are the wounded deer here) and you must tread lightly. Going for a hug is usually OK, but then again, a smile and a sweet, tender hello is just fine.
Don't wait for him to make the first move. Once you start to feel the chemistry develop, be direct and confident, letting your man know in unequivocal terms that you want him back.
Give her time. Allow time for the dust to settle on her emotions before you come begging for forgiveness. Provide her with time to vent, dissect the situation and get her mind together before you attempt to make things better or discuss. Allot her a few days, or even weeks for the initial feelings to smooth over before you try to get back in her good graces.
Beg, plead and get down on your knees if you have to. If the relationship means that much to you, humble yourself and ask him or her to come back.
Pay attention to where she spends her free time. If she goes out of her way to watch your basketball games at the park or tries to be at the same social events you attend, chances are she's still in love with you.
Keep up a placid exterior. Don't initiate contact and don't wait for him to contact you. Remember that getting back together must be his idea. If you interact with him at all during the breakup, be polite and friendly. Ask how he's doing but don't pry about personal details. Don't volunteer much, if any, information about yourself -- keep the focus on him. Don't reminisce about your relationship, say you miss him or try to maneuver the conversation around to the subject of reconciliation. Treat him as you would an old friend.
Your ex probably left you because he needed to sort things out. Let him do that. If you are on the phone or under his feet every time he turns around, he won't have time to figure out what he wants to do, and he won't have time to miss you.
You don't want your ex girlfriend to suddenly see that you lack any confidence around her, because that is the kind of thing that will turn off a woman pretty quickly. Show her that you still have that confidence that women find appealing, and you will have a much better chance of making her feel the way that she needs to feel to have another shot with her.
The attraction, the sparks, they all have to come back if you are going to have a fighting chance at getting back with her. You need to flirt with her. It's not enough to think that you can sit down and have a logical conversation with her and she will want to take you back, the sparks and the chemistry has to be present again. Just be sure that you don't go too far to the point where it seems you are desperate for her attention.
Email him or send him an instant message asking how his day was. Not only will this show that you still care, but it will show that you have moved past your differences and can finally be there for him as a friend and someone to talk to. Do not begin interrogating him on the internet. This will only make him less likely to consider you again as his girlfriend.
Determine exactly why your relationship ended in the first place. Figure out what mistakes you made and what positive aspects there were to your relationship. If you get to the point where you contact your ex or have a conversation with him, you'll need to have a clear idea on exactly what happened between the two of you. This is particularly important so that you can both prevent the same problems from occurring in the future.
Behave as if you are old friends, not former lovers (who later became enemies). When he meets you at the cafe you always loved, it will be tempting to run and kiss him full on on the mouth. Control yourself. This person is probably very wounded (or perhaps you are the wounded deer here) and you must tread lightly. Going for a hug is usually OK, but then again, a smile and a sweet, tender hello is just fine.
Don't wait for him to make the first move. Once you start to feel the chemistry develop, be direct and confident, letting your man know in unequivocal terms that you want him back.
Give her time. Allow time for the dust to settle on her emotions before you come begging for forgiveness. Provide her with time to vent, dissect the situation and get her mind together before you attempt to make things better or discuss. Allot her a few days, or even weeks for the initial feelings to smooth over before you try to get back in her good graces.
Beg, plead and get down on your knees if you have to. If the relationship means that much to you, humble yourself and ask him or her to come back.
Pay attention to where she spends her free time. If she goes out of her way to watch your basketball games at the park or tries to be at the same social events you attend, chances are she's still in love with you.
Keep up a placid exterior. Don't initiate contact and don't wait for him to contact you. Remember that getting back together must be his idea. If you interact with him at all during the breakup, be polite and friendly. Ask how he's doing but don't pry about personal details. Don't volunteer much, if any, information about yourself -- keep the focus on him. Don't reminisce about your relationship, say you miss him or try to maneuver the conversation around to the subject of reconciliation. Treat him as you would an old friend.
Your ex probably left you because he needed to sort things out. Let him do that. If you are on the phone or under his feet every time he turns around, he won't have time to figure out what he wants to do, and he won't have time to miss you.
You don't want your ex girlfriend to suddenly see that you lack any confidence around her, because that is the kind of thing that will turn off a woman pretty quickly. Show her that you still have that confidence that women find appealing, and you will have a much better chance of making her feel the way that she needs to feel to have another shot with her.
The attraction, the sparks, they all have to come back if you are going to have a fighting chance at getting back with her. You need to flirt with her. It's not enough to think that you can sit down and have a logical conversation with her and she will want to take you back, the sparks and the chemistry has to be present again. Just be sure that you don't go too far to the point where it seems you are desperate for her attention.
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